What Time Is It?

There are 24 hours in each day. The average adult sleeps 7-8.5 hours per day which brings us down to 15.5 hours remaining in the day. Without the option to work from home, many of us travel to and from work, even dropping off and picking up children from daycare and/or school along the way. Travel varies from person to person but lets just say we each spend a total of 1 hour driving to and from our destinations each day. Depending on our given professions, we work anywhere from 8-12 hours per day. So for the people working 8 hours each day, after sleeping, driving to and from our destinations, and working, there are 6.5 hours of the day remaining.

If you're like me, you spend an hour to an hour and a half at the gym 3-5 days per week and an hour and a half every Sunday at church. Between extra curricular activities (yours and your children), helping with homework, putting to bed, playtime (depending on the child's age), it's difficult to actually calculate the time we spend with and invest into our children. Not to mention the time spent cooking, cleaning, and simply organizing & preparing for each day. And again if you're like me & enrolled in school, attending classes & completing assignments commands a great deal of time as well.

It often seems as if there's never enough time in the day to get everything done. I end up staying awake late at night completing documentation for work, folding laundry, or finishing some miscellaneous task that didn't get done earlier in the day. I always wish there was more time to enjoy my family/friends, more time to volunteer for causes close to my heart & give back to the community, more time to read good books, write poetry, laugh, & relax.

Every 2-3 months, I find myself re-evaluating how I spend my time, what things & people aren't worthy of my time, and who & what deserves more of my time.

My son and I pray together every morning & night but one thing I realize is that I don't give as much time as I should to studying God's word. I used to attend Bible Study regularly, read from a devotional every morning, and spent my nights reading the the Word but lately, I have been shamefully slack. I need to be held accountable in that area because it's just as important if not even more important than everything else that consumes my time.

We only have 24 hours in a day & the truth is that we never know when those days will end. Life is too short to be concerned with people who don't matter or worrying about situations beyond our control. Make the most of your time while you can. Cherish the special times with loved ones, enjoy all that life has to offer, and make sure to spend time with God now if you're praying to spend an eternity with Him later.

Gotta Love the Kids

For the past 11 years, I have worked with children in the mental health field as a Group Home Supervisor, Associate Professional, Qualified Professional, Residential Counselor, Foster Care Coordinator and Case Manager. My work is truly fulfilling but can be very stressful & draining. I love my children as well as the parents and foster parents that I supervise. Ordinarily, I don't cry easy but there have been situations when it comes to my children that have caused me to break down in tears both privately & publically. As embarassing as it may have seemed at the time, I have broken down in tears in treatment team meetings simply unable to contain myself because it is so difficult to work with these children and not become emotionally involved on some human level.

As many of you know, I am currently in graduate school & will receive my Masters of Education hopeful to make a slight career change. Not for any lack of love for what I do but simply because I believe God wants to use me in another capacity to influence the lives of young people.

I haven't shared any of my poetry on this blog yet so I thought I'd share this poem that I wrote years ago for my children. As cliche' as it sounds, the children are indeed our future so please continue to encourage & pray for them.

A Social Worker's Dilemma

every day kids come into our office
wearing sad faces
carrying wounded hearts
fighting hard to hide emotion
not realizing that they're not trapped
but entangled into a web of confusion
hindering the release from the imprisonment of their minds

and then some come
bearing their souls
praying that we'll be the one to rescue them
from this never ending cycle of hopelessness
some believing they don't owe themselves anything
some believeing that we owe them everything

and here we sit
behind wooden desks and bachelor degrees
restricted by "codes of ethics"
worker/client boundaries
and laws written by some person who obviously
has never seen a child's face light up
when they walk into the room

we are made to assign them case numbers
as if they aren't people
and when their 18th birthday arrives
we feed them to the sharks
expecting them to survive in a world unknown
because for years, every important decision has been made for them
almost like saying since they don't "belong" to anyone
they don't have a voice?

we are not allowed to give hugs
or show love
our job is to keep records
make referrals
care but not too much
help but not get too involved

we spend hours reading 3 inch binders detailing their lives
we're given pagers and cell phones to be accessible at all times
because if they need to cry
we should listen
but not comfort
because that's crossing lines

wanting so desperately to give them everything
not out of pity
but because they deserve it
instead, we become bystanders
of preventable train wrecks
then wonder how these kids got off track

I'm not saying that there's something wrong with being a professional
nor do I have a problem doing my job
I'm just saying that these kids have been through enough already

they're longing for the arms of ten thousand mothers to surround them
they're longing to hold the hand of someone they can call daddy
no family to provide support
no friends to turn to
they give us so much hope
and in their eyes, we may be their only hope

I'm not saying there's something wrong with being a professional
nor do I have a problem doing my job
I'm just saying that these kids have been through enough already

I guess I just want to know
at the end of the day
when their file is stored away in some locked cabinet
and we aren't there to give them some sort of assessment
or drive them to school
if not us...

WHO will love these kids?

Itisha Morgan
29 April 2004

A Star is Born...

To God be the glory for all the marvelous and wonderful things He has done! I cannot begin this day, or any other day, without first acknowledging the Creator and giving Him praise & honor for waking me up this morning!!!!

On a beautiful Sunday evening, April 22nd, 32 years ago, A STAR WAS BORN. As my mother recalls, I was almost delivered in my Grandma's car which means I was ready to get up out of there LOL So as you can gather, from day one I was FOCUSED & DETERMINED.

*singing* Its my burfday, its my burfday, its my burfday :)

I know it's a general rule that ladies don't reveal their age. However, I have come to understand & appreciate the fact that there are some folk who don't live to see their 32nd birthday so I don't mind sharing the goodness of God's favor and blessings over my life.

I can't say enough how grateful I am to just BE. I know that God is doing a great work in me. I appreciate all the love, support, prayers, and encouragement that so many of you offer. Some things only get better with age -- surely I am one of them ;). In my 20's I had no idea what I wanted in life (although I thought I did) so I'm especially grateful that God allowed me to make it to my 30's because it wasn't until then that I believe I truly began to LIVE. At this moment, I believe myself to be the healthiest (mentally, emotionally, spiritually) & happiest I've been in my adult life! I'm absolutely loving this skin that I'm in, confident & certain that I am exactly where God wants me to be, and filled with great excitement about what the future holds. My faith grows stronger each day. There is a peace that I can't explain & a joy deep on the inside that I know only comes from my Heavenly Father. I pray that I am always learning, always growing, and most importantly always about my Father's business.

My phone began ringing & beeping with text messages, BBMs, and emails last night at 11:45pm -- Thanks so much to everyone who poured a little sunshine into my special day ;) Tears fill my eyes as I think about the goodness of Jesus and all he's done for me...makes me want to get my shout on this morning, simply realizing that I am absolutely blessed beyond measure. The morning begins now with a 90 minute workout at the gym followed by a few hours of feeding the homeless downtown at Shepherd's Table Soup Kitchen where I love to volunteer :) Already got my hair DID last week, awesome pedicure on yesterday, and scheduled for an hour massage this afternoon. Sushi & cupcakes with some of my girls tonight... it's going to be a WONDERFUL day!!!!!

"When I stand before God at the end of my life, I would hope that I would not have a single bit of talent left, and could say, "I used everything you gave me." -- Erma Bombeck

STILL Standing

There are some things that I want to get off of my chest and I'm going to try to say it as tactfully as I know how...

Every day we all face some type of opposition. The devil is always busy interrupting our day with unnecessary drama & making intricate, deliberate attempts to disrupt our peace. He is fiercely determined & persistent in trying to manipulate us and/or bring us down. Ordinarily, I wouldn't want to give him my attention or even acknowledge his antics but it seems so necessary to make it clear WHO I belong to & to call a spade a spade!

Just as a boxer studies his opponent, devil, I have studied you. I know how you operate. You invite yourself into my home as if you are a welcome guest. You show up at my job trying to jeopardize my productivity & income. I see you working your way into my relationships with family and friends trying to create mistrust & controversy, destroy bonds, & cause distance and separation. I hear you lurking in my mind trying to plant doubt, fear & confusion; wanting me to second guess God's promises and plans (Jeremiah 29:11 "For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord. Plans to prosper you and not harm you, plans to give you hope and a future"). I've even seen you present yourself in the lives of the people around me by splitting marriages, closing businesses, & ruining partnerships. I have peeped your game...I'm on to you. And you might want to know that you are fighting a losing battle because I've got someone in my corner who remains UNDEFEATED ("What, then, shall we say in response to these things? If God is for us, who can be against us? Romans 8:31).

You may have thought that I was down for the count but I was just on my knees in prayer. You may have thought that you had my face buried in the sand but I was just hidden in the Word of God. You may have thought that I was a punk for not fighting back but I already knew that the battle wasn't mine. You may have thought that the tears you saw streaming from my face were a sign of weakness but truth be told, those tears are a sign of my strength. I am a Warrior; a Champion; a Conqueror (Romans 8:37 "In all these things we are more than conquerors through him who loved us").

You insist on attacking me on every side especially when I made a conscious decision to be all about my Father's business ("You are of God, little children, and have overcome them, because he who is in you is greater than he who is in the world" 1 John 4:4). I get that's just what you do. I know that you want my life. For as long as there is breath in my body, I know that you will continue to try to destroy who I am & try to prevent me from becoming who God has destined me to become. You will continue to assassinate my character, work forcefully to kill my spirit and steal my joy.

The funny thing is that everything you mean for my bad, God turns it around for my good. Your attacks only make me WISER, BETTER, & STRONGER! Most importantly, my faith is not wavered. So I'm prompted to bring to your awareness as reflected in the history of our encounters, that at the end of the day...when all is said and done...when the dust settles and the smoke clears... and even when the doo doo (yeah I said it) hits the fan, I'm STILL standing strong!!!

PSA: I ain't the one you wanna mess with!!!!! ;)

I GOT CONNECTIONS

Webster's Dictionary defines connections as the act of connecting; the state of being connected; causal or logical relation or sequence. Contextual relation or association; relationship in fact. A relation of personal intimacy, coherence, continuity; a link...

We all have connections to other people. Some connections are in fact deeper than others. Our connections exist for many reasons whether by blood relation, marriage, mutual friends, employment, church, school, Greek life, etc. We use these connections to advance ourselves whether for the purpose of obtaining employment, having our name added on to the VIP list at the club, or receiving a discount at our favorite store. We always seem to know just who to call for "the hook up" which is what we consider... networking :)

Sometimes, we get the big head about our connections. We think that certain associations guarantee us respect, rewards, and recognition. We believe that our connections entitle us to certain privileges. Some of us become entirely too arrogant & boastful about who we know, how close we are to who we know, and how long we've known them. We become so proud of our connections because it provides us with a status, makes us feel important and dare I say it -- some of us even feel that our connections make us better than others.

We invest so much time, energy and resources into our horizontal connections that we often times neglect our vertical connection. It doesn't matter if Oprah is our neighbor, or if Rachael Ray has personally cooked & served us a meal in our very own kitchen, or if President Obama himself is our homeboy...If we are NOT connected to the most high, all other connections are void/invalid. John 14:6 says, Jesus answered, “I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." Now that's what I call a connection!

I value my connections. I understand why being connected is important. More than anything, I am grateful for my connection to a higher power. I don't need Facebook or email to be connected to God. Sprint nor Verizon are necessary to connect me to Him because even when the power lines are down, our connection is still current. I don't have to be in a certain place at a certain time to meet or mingle with the right people because I'm always connected to the RIGHT ONE! He's my connection to that job I want, He's my connection to that home loan that I need. He's got a VIP list called the book of life & that's where I want my name to be written because the Psalmist says that everyone that shall be found written in this book shall awake to everlasting life.

With all of that being said, it is good to be connected to others & I take nothing from that. I simply hope that we remember that our focus and primary concentration should first be on our connection to Christ. If you really want to brag about who you know, how close you are, how you know who you know, and how long you've known them then it may be wise to get connected to the one who has ALL the connections ;)

I GOT CONNECTIONS! Who's in your network?!

I'm in Love... Under New Management

"Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It does not dishonor others, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres." 1 Corinthians 13:4-7

I am so in love ya'll... I can hardly contain myself!!! What better time to share the details & joy of this great union than on Valentine's Day. I've known him for a long time but in the last few years, our relationship has grown deeper & much more intimate. He's so loving, compassionate, and giving. Its hard to even comprehend the sacrifice that he has made for me. He knows everything about me yet accepts me just as I am... flaws, imperfections & all. Even at my worst, he sees the very best in me. I thought I knew love before but I was just kidding myself. This love is on a higher level... its the greatest love of all. I never knew that love could truly be unconditional until him. He's my first thought in the morning & my last thought at night... I can't help but to think about him even throughout my day. When I need him, he's there without fail or hesitation. Talk about "ride or die" -- come hell or high water, he has my back! I trust in him completely. If I'm feeling down, he wraps me in his loving arms and comforts me like nobody else can, like nobody else ever has. When I do wrong, he forgives me without throwing it back in my face but instead helps me to become a better me. Even those times when I didn't/don't love myself, he loves me. He's better to me than I ever am or have been to myself. He treats me like I am the apple of his eye. Ya'll, he truly makes me feel special... I told him that he makes me feel like a million bucks but he told me that I am PRICELESS! Every day he blows my mind!!!! He is the one... I know because he makes me whole. The mere thought of him & his greatness brings an overflow of tears to my eyes. I want to shout it out at the top of my lungs for the world to know! I just can't keep it to myself... Lord, I love you!!!! (Who did you think I was talking about? LOL) God, I thank you!!!! You are Alpha and Omega... the beginning and the end. You are Jehovah Jireh, my provider... Jehovah Shalom, my peace. With you, all things are possible (Matthew 19:26) & nothing is impossible with you (Luke 1:37). Can't nobody hold me like you can, can't nobody love me like you can. Falling in love with you is the best thing that I've ever done. Thank you for loving me. Thank you for keeping me. Thank you for protecting me Lord. If it had not been for the Lord on my side, where would I be? You are my everything. Without you, I am nothing.

With my whole heart Lord, I love you.

Happy Valentine's Day!

WHY I WRITE...

It has been a month since my last blog, certainly not for lack of thoughts that I haven't written. I'd actually prepared a blog to send out on last week but wasn't led to press the SEND button... The more I edited the entry & considered its content, the more I realized that the message presented simply served no purpose at this time (but someday). Instead, I believe that it is more necessary to take a moment to fully explain why I write. Ever since I was a little girl, I've loved writing. My Grandma worked at Wake Medical Center and often times brought home green & white lab paper and boy did I enjoy writing stories or scribbling all over that. Twenty years ago (at the age of 11) I began to write poetry which has grown into a fairly large collection. Before blogging per se was even invented, I'd often times write "random thoughts" that I would share with family & close friends. Out of pure boredom last year around this time while being snowed in, www.theinfamousbackseatdriver.blogspot.com was born.

Writing has always been an outlet for me. It's therapeutic. There may be things that I am unable to speak aloud or share verbally but if given a piece of paper & pen, I am capable of expressing every thought & emotion beautifully and clearly. My PRIVATE notebook is a safe haven. It keeps my secrets. It allows me to truly be myself. While I am also allowed to express myself honestly on this blog, I am careful about what I release publicly which is why last week's entry was not distributed.

Many times I may write not about myself & my own experiences but about the experiences others have shared with me. While writing is indeed therapeutic, I realize that my poetry & writing is able to bless others. I cannot count how many times I've written on this blog or shared a poem through email to have someone reply about how much they love it, how it fits into their current situation, how it's a perspective that they hadn't considered, how it brought a smile to their face or tears to their eyes, and/or brightened their otherwise gloomy day. It does my heart well to know that I made a positive contribution to someone's day... a meaningful deposit into someone's life.

Understand that it is always with much thoughtfulness & care that any of my thoughts/writings are shared. We sometimes underestimate the power of our words. It is said that words don't hurt but the truth is that words do many things... words hate, words love, words do in fact hurt -- whether we admit it or not. It is never my intention to be hurtful to anyone in my writings but it is always my intention to be truthful. I appreciate those of you who actually take the time to read my writings. Know that I am not at all offended if the time is not taken to do so.

I write because as crazy as it sounds, I love how words look on paper. I love how words are clustered together to form something clever or different. I write because its an easier way to come face to face with pain but there's also something beautiful about how the story is written. Writing makes me happy! I write because it is so liberating, honest, & raw. It helps bring me back to the very essence of who I am. I write to inspire. To encourage. To expose. To uplift. To give God glory and praise. It is a gift... a gift that I am blessed to share with others & I appreciate your allowing me to share this gift with you.